Nutritional Information

Ripened at 28 years, still full of piss, vinegar, whiskey, cigar smoke and red meat. Still full of wrath, still giggling at retarded children and illegitimate white trash babies, still listening to Mannie Fresh (eight years longer than any person ever should), still cursing too much, still talking to myself, still scribbling the insane ramblings of my own mind, still offending everyone I come in contact with and still being contradictory towards everyone, just to get my own rocks off.

And just a note to the ladies out there… YES! I am taken (and I knew you were going to ask that, on account of my dashing good looks). So, look all you want, but keep your hands off the merchandise.

I live in a small bungalow near the Atlantic ocean, with my lovely lady, Dee and my cat, Tsunami Thompkins Von Babyhead. I enjoy smoking cigars, drinking, writing, cooking, baking, beating my girlfriend and trying different varieties of General Foods International Powdered Coffees.